Calories, anyone?

WELL :) GOOD NEWS:

Well, first, let me back up. Cady had her dr. appt with the GI specialist last wednesday and they drew bloodwork and took a lot of tests. They said they would ONLY call IF the lab results came back abnormal. I called on Friday to see if they came in (impatient, yes!) and they told me they wouldn't be in until the end of the following week. Well, on Monday, i was in Wallgreens shopping and i noticed I had a missed call from her GI. They left a message stating the results came in and I needed to call them! My mind INSTANTLY started racing, but of course when I called back they were at lunch :(

After I waited the longest hour of my life, they finally called back just to tell me that her lab results showed that she was allergic to milk! WHAT A RELIEF! That was old news! (side note, her egg allergy did not show, but that doesn't mean it went away so we have to see an allergist to double check).

They tested for EVERYTHING! All of her organs, including kidneys, liver, pancreas. They did a CBC, and a complete metabiolic study, and about 5 other tests that I can't spell and all the results were NORMAL! :) PRAISE GOD!

Anyways, i had to take Cady to her regular pedi this week for something totally unrelated to her weight, and i told him everything that happened with her GI. Thankfully, all of her dr's are through Cook's Children's medical so they each can look at each other's charts. Her dr (this sweet OLD guy who is sooo old it's cute) was pretty much satisfied with her results, but wants us to come back in 6 weeks to see if she's gaining weight.

The reason he wants to see if he's gaining is because Cady is now on a high calorie diet. Basically, they gave us high calorie juices for her to drink (though they are on back order for 3 weeks) and this stuff called Duocal, which is LITERALLY powdered calories. I am to sprinkle/mix it in any and everything! I put it with her fruit as a dip (like powdered sugar). i mix it in her ketchup, applesauce, oatmeal, veggies, butter, and even put it on her popsicles!

Do you know how hard it is for me to feed her like this? I mean, not that i'm just feeding her "junk"... we need to avoid empty calories but since there aren't many calories on veggies we need to add calories to them! i don't add it to her meat bc, well, powder doesn't really "stick" to meat, that's why I mix it in her bbq sauce or ketchup or gravy. She gets 8 scoops of calories per day (per her dietician) and each scoop is 25 calories. I'm also trying to feed her more "fattening" snacks, which is SOOOO HARD!!!!! Because, for every 1 cookie she eats, i eat 7! and for every 1 marshmallow she eats, i eat 4! and for every bite of bread she eats, I eat a slice!! YOU SEE MY PROBLEM ;) lol, I buy her these popcorn CHIPS, bc popcorn is on her list of food but she's too little to eat popcorn but these chips are a great alternative, and i don't like them which is PERFECT ;) lol

Since she's allergic to milk, she can't have ice cream but I did buy her this soy/non dairy "ice cream" and it's actually pretty good (and expensive!) but the problem is, she doesn't really like it, so i end up eating it! lol

I had to special order her "calories" and picked them up today from the pharmacist and it looks like it's going to cost me about $30/month for the powder. The juice boxes had to be special ordered too (i found out that it's Ensure, but not the creamy kind you buy on the shelf because that has milk protein (which is specifically what cady is allergic to) and these are like Hi-C juice boxes. they come in apple and berry flavor. Cady isn't too fond of them so we end up watering them down to get her to drink them which is fine. Her dr. said she's to get 2 juice boxes per day. For a month's supply, it's looking like it's gonna cost me over $100. I'm going to see if I can get insurance to pay for this. I don't know where to begin, but I did get a letter of medical necessity so i figure that's a good place to start.

Her regular pedi is hoping she will gain at least 1 pound within these 6 weeks. He said he would be tickled if she gained a pound in 6 weeks, considering she's only gained 5 pounds within the last year! lol I'm not too concerned since all the tests came back normal. I'm not trying to fatten her up either, i just want her to weigh on the chart (even the 1 percentile will suffice!!!!)

She is so cute though with her little self and I love her and he Lord perfectly created her to be this little ball of joy :) and I am extremely thankful to Him for her!

Well, that's the latest :)

peace, love, and blessings

-the not so hungry mama-

ALMOST 17lbs`

Cady is 21 months... and is ALMOST 17 lbs :)

Sound like she's way too small? Sure does! Cause for concern??? To me-YES!!!To her daddy- NO! To her pediatrician- not so much! To her GastroInterologist-not at all! To her Nutritionalist-NOPE!

There are reasons that a Pedi, GI specialist, and Nutritionalist would have cause for concern for kids this small (failure to thrive, failure to gain weight, etc) but Cady IS thriving (exceeding some milestones -shout out to my potty trained 21 month old- and she IS gaining weight. Her body is proportioned (which they checked today), her brain is developing, she eats just fine and is not a picky eater, and is overall a normal, smart, 21 month old girl.

When you look at a typical growth chart, Cady's weight isn't on there! In fact, she in the -1.65% for children her age as far as weight is concerned. Though she has always been small, she was in the 3% at one point, lol.

Ever since she was about 6 months old i've asked the doctors is her weight ok... what do i need to do to make her gain weight... why is she so small... when will she gain weight, etc. Her pedi wasn't too concerned bc of the simple fact that she was growing at her own "normal" and that as long as she's "growing on a curve" she is fine. Well, she IS growing, and she IS, growing on a curve. She's just growing at her own pace. Her pedi is really nice and old and experienced and he basically would tell me that i have no cause for concern. He reminded me that in order to have the standard curve and averages, they have to have BIG kids, and SMALL kids in order to come with an average. I took math, and though i've never been good at it, i know that the average of 100 and 0 is 50! ;) I loved the fact that when I have a concern, he ALWAYS goes and study's her chart before he gives me an answer.

I wouldn't really press the issue UNTIL her next dr.'s appt, then we would start the cycle of Q&A all over again. In between appts I have been known to call and double check i'm doing everything right, lol. Chris would then lecture me on how we have done everything "right" and she's just little and healthy and CADENCE and perfectly created by God to be small.

Though I've continued (and will continue) to feed her healthy meals, and not a lot of junk, i admit that I do try to put a little meat on those bones, lol. I buy her the bread with the most calories and then slap butter on it, i often feed her peanut butter (which i learned too much PB can cause a child to develop an allergy, oops, bc the Lord knows the last thing she needs is another food allergy), and for the past few months I've been feeding her 1 avacado per day (high in fat and calories), and she also gets a heavy heavy snack (like oatmeal, or something that will stick) right before bed.

Well, Monday I took her to the pedi (she lost her voice) and i brought the issue up YET AGAIN. I got the same answer, "let me study her chart" and when they come back it's the normal "she's fine, just small" and they try to calm my nerves and say it's ok, she's little, don't worry, etc. And they suggest ways to add more calories to her diet. Well, typically, those "ways" involve adding a type of instant breakfast drink (which she can't have bc she's allergic to milk), or feeding her ice cream (which she can't have) or something made from milk (which she can't have, lol).

I kinda pressed the issue and finally, the dr set us up to visit the GasteroInterologist (sp?) who is part of the Cooks' Children's team. Luckily, someone cancelled a appointment and we were able to go today (wednesday). IDK why i was so nervous... i couldn't think of Cady's birthday :( That was the FIRST question they asked and i BOMBED it! It's worse than forgetting how to spell your name! lol.

As soon as they took us back, they made us strip Cady down to her bday suite and step on a scale. It read 7.7kl which converted to "almost" 17 lbs. They put us in the room and Dr. Keng (the gi specialist) came and gave Cady a physical evaluation, which included pressing all over her tummy. Cady was NOT feeling it at all! Then, Dr. Keng asked us a billion questions about her general health, family history, what she eats, etc. She looked at Cady's growth chart and said the same thing her pedi said, she's growing on her own curve, which is a good thing. Her conclusion??? She's perfectly normal and genetics is probably the reason why. I later called my mom and my grandma who confirmed that I was indeed super small growing up (where's that problem when i need it, lol).

Wait, let me back up, the FIRST THING we noticed when they put us in the exam room was this special "CHART" which showed the 7 types of poop... I spent about 5 minutes trying to identify Cady's poop number on the chart. Oh, the joys of motherhood :)

I asked Dr. Keng if Cady is underweight... She basically said, if i compare her to a normal child, yes... but when i compare her to HER chart and where SHE is supposed to be... NO, SHE IS AT HER AVERAGE! Even though her average is smaller it's fine since she IS growing (apparently, i didn't get the message the first few times she said it).

Dr. Keng ordered blood work (7 tests) to double check that there's no underlying issue with her kidneys or anything. I asked her if the weak vessel in the umbilical cord could have anything to do with it and she said no. Which is a major relief. IDK why, but i would have so much guilt if MY pregnancy caused any health problems for her.

Next, we met with a nutritionalist, Adriane (pronounced Audrey-on-AA) who spoke with this BEAUTIFUL Mexican accent. We went over what she eats, i told her how i try to fatten her up and she told me i'm doing a great job :) Both her and the Dr. wondered where I learned these "tricks" from and i told them good old google! :)

The GI specialist gave us some high calorie drinks (that are milk protein free) and Adriane, gave us a few more (thanks because i'm sure they cost a lot of money since you have to special order them through the pharmacy). She also gave us this powder type of stuff to boost caloric intake. She also gave me this Ensure type of drink which i learned (after reading the label) is used for the food when kids have feeding tubes. We got a few juice drink type of juice boxes that have 200 calories vs the normal 70/box drinks at the store... again, will need to be special ordered (and don't taste too great).

So after over an hour and a half, both the Gi specialist, and the nutritionalist concluded that Cady is perfectly fine and perfectly healthy! MAJOR RELIEF and I could see Chris give me the "i told you so" look.

I will have to call Adriane once a week to give her a rough idea of what Cady has eaten, and will do a 2 day study over what she eats so that they can analyze to see if she's getting all the vitamins and nutritions she needs. I GOT THIS! MY CHILD EATS THE RAINBOW :) Every food group and color is more than covered :)

The nutritionalist gave us a list of ways to boost caloric intake. Here is a sample of what's on the list AND I DID NOT MAKE THIS UP (though i am paraphrasing):

- add butter, more butter, and mayo! it even says to put butter on warm bread bc the butter will melt and allow you to add MORE butter, lol

-use sour cream and jelly (and honey if the child is over the age of 2) often

-top pudding, pies, and dessert with cream or whipped cream

-provide double strength milk (which i learned is whole milk with powdered milk mixed in)

-add Carb supplements like Karo Syrup to drinks

-give milkshakes over juice and water

-bread and fry meats and veggies

-eat marshmallows

-add dry milk powder when cooking (i have the can of calorie booster for this)

-add instant breakfast to milkshakes

-boil eggs, chop them up finely, and add to gravy

-choose dessert recipes that contain eggs

-spread peanut butter on fruit, sauces, shakes or as a topping for ice cream

THE DIET I'VE BEEN DREAMING OF MY WHOLE LIFE!!! lol

Though I will be incorporating some of these ways to boost her caloric intake, my goal is not to "fatten her up" but it is to hopefully get her to gain some healthy weight. I see the GI dr. in 3 months and i hope she's gained at least 2 pounds by then. If not, it's fine :)

Do u know how hard it will be for me to feed her a billion calories a day in all types of foods that i'm not supposed to eat and actually NOT eat it myself? I just got through eating half her fruit snacks :/

We did get another allergy test done on her to see if she is still allergic to milk and eggs. Prayerfully she's not!

I'm just glad that they confirmed that she is HEALTHY "just small" and i know the blood work will say just the same!

Speaking of bloodwork, Cady told the lady to "TAKE IT OUT!!!" talking about the needle, and it was hilarious!

Well, let me try to get her to drink one of these supplements... while I avoid trying to taste it ;0

-Our primary care physician is Jesus!!-

"Big momma"

how to (potty) train a princess

I've heard billions (ok, not really billions) of stories of parents and their potty training techniques. I've read up on it, i've asked about it, i've even made up a super cute and cool POTTY DANCE ... all to prepare for THE experience known as POTTY TRAINING :)

Well, let me save you time, energy, effort, and the shock value by sharing these valuable lessons that you won't find in a book OR on the internet... i'm talking about the TRUTH of training (ok, so i may exaggerate a little bit, but it makes for a great read. lol)

take notes: you will want to remember this stuff!

1. skip pull ups! It's pretty much the same as a diaper for a toddler, and they cost twice as much :( I went straight to undies. the problem with that was Cady was (is) too small to buy them so we had to get them special made. It was fun, I got to pick the print :) ha! Now, she is in some special ordered Gerber 18 month training panties (shout out to my mom for finding and ordering these for us), and though they are still a tad too big, they will get the job done :)

2. You know how fast you would JUMP if someone yells "FIRE!!!"... well, that's about the speed you will RUN when your child yell's "POTTY!!!" and you won't let ANYTHING get in your way! You will grab that child so fast by anything that is attached to her body and hurl her on the closest toilet you can find! This may mean leaping through the air over a dog, or a miniature pony or doing an awesome football move to get your husband out of the way. By any means necessary ;0

3. Bribery works!!! I like a good bribe, and so do kids :) I used M&Ms and turned it into a learning experience. I tried to do the -if you do #1, you get 1, if you do #2, you get 2- method, but it always ended up with her getting 2... but she only got them if I (or she) called out and chose the correct color. My child likes brown ones for whatever reason. Chris called himself laying down the law and told me "NO M&Ms BEFORE 9AM" but that changed when Cady pooped in the potty first thing in the morning. he sure did get her 2 pieces of Candy before she had breakfast! Um hum... But I sometimes use stickers :)

4. Public restrooms can be a NIGHTMARE!!! I think you know what I mean so I will not have to explain any further!

5. Speaking of public restrooms.... know the EXACT location of every restroom in every store that you ever plan on being in!!! AND KNOW EXACTLY HOW MANY STEPS AND MILISECONDS IT WILL TAKE YOU TO GET THERE!! Even if that means you are WWWWAAAAYYYY by the frozen food section at Kroger and the rr is WWWAAAAYYY by the flowers, you better be prepared to push that cart clear across the store and in a HURRY and don't let the slow shoppers, elderly, or children get in your way! Remember: YOU ARE ON A MISSION!!

6.... EVEN if half of those grocery store marathons are false alarms (my child says she has to poo poo potty when she really just has to pass gas, lol)

7... EVEN if that means that you are right in the middle of loading a basket full of groceries on the conveyor belt! You better do a one arm swing motion to throw all that crap back in the basket while breaking all the eggs and squashing all the bread and back up into someone else who has an even bigger basket of groceries and everyone is looking at you like you are crazy but then you get the smile of approval from other moms who have been in the same boat and feel your pain... sigh :(

8: take your child to the rr RIGHT BEFORE you leave the house and AS SOON AS you get to your destination, even if it's a 2 minute drive! A toddler bladder has to be the size of a mustard seed!

9. If there's only 1 rest room, and your child has to use it as the SAME time as a pregnant woman: THE PREGNANT WOMAN WINS ALWAYS!!! I remember what that was like... you could not have PAID me to hold my bladder when I was pregnant... shoot, towards the last trimester, your child could move in a new position and the floodgates could open without you even knowing it! I feel you preggers, i do! And it's way more socially acceptable for a child to pee on themselves than it is for a grown woman! And, chances are, the child has a change of clothes and won't have to walk around wet... think about that one! :( I Feel you, i do!!!!

10. keep a small potty conveniently located throughout the house! We have 3 rr's in our home.... and 2 additional potties!!! And they are ALL equally as necessary!

11. ACCIDENTS. WILL. HAPPEN!!! Let your child know you are disappointed, but don't scold them for it! Chances are, they are disappointed in themselves

12. When driving down the middle of I-20, your child WILL tell you they need to use the bathroom, and you WILL panic just a bit, and you WILL pray that you can pull over or SOMETHING before the flood gates open. Sometimes you will be lucky, sometimes not so much :(

13. if you're taking your child to a park, take a potty with you for convenience sake (and to avoid public park rr's)

14: Enjoy the experience! You will have plenty of stories to share, and plenty of memories to remember! Have fun with it :)

15. Potty training is not a competition. I think as long as your little one is day trained before school you are doing GOOD :) Though I am excited and proud that we bought our last pack of diapers when Cadence was 20 months old (hopefully those were the last) understand that not every child will be as easy to potty train and that is OK!

16. Speaking of "potty training" the hardest part is training the parents, lol

17. Ask God for wisdom along the way and He will give it to you! That goes for EVERY situation and while you're at it, thank HIM for your perfect gift (your child) whom He created and loves more than you THINK you do :)

And THAT, my friends, is what it is :)

Love, just another potty training parent

Ballin on a budget!

So... i love couponing as you probably already know :)

Well, today, I decided to tackle CVS to see how much money I could save and here's how I did:

I got 2 bottles of contact solution. Each bottle was regularly Priced at $7.98, but they had a CVS store credit thing for $4 off, and i had a $3 off coupon (i combined 1 set of coupons for each bottle of solution)... so I got each bottle of solution for just $.96/piece :)

Revlon nail polish: regular $6.29 but it was on sale for $3.99 and they gave you a $3 store credit thing and I combined that with my $1 off coupon... so it was FREE!!!

I got a $3 bottle of eye drops for FREE thanks to my cvs coupon

I got a thing of Mentos candy for $.29 thanks to my $.50 off coupon

Wipes: Regular $7.99 for the big pack but I had a $1 off coupon and combined it with a free wipes coupon ($2.50 value) thing so i got 4 packs of wipes for $7

Box of Huggies was on sale for $20, i had a $3.50 off coupon so i got a BIG box of diapers for just $17.50 :)

I had a a CVS $2 off baby items coupon

AND i got a FREE umbrella stroller for spending $25 (before coupons) on baby items :)

Before my coupons and sales prices using my CVS card, my total was about $76.50... AFTER my coupons and using my CVS card and getting prices, i paid about $26.50... SCORE :)

and THAT is how I save money :)

the crazy coupon lady

I remember a time when I used to brag about how much money I spent on stuff.... not that I ever really spent THAT much money on anything. Though I thought I was pretty ok growing up and i never needed or wanted for anything, I did come from a single parent household so i know we weren't balling out of control!

My college days were a little tough. Not horrible horrible because I did make it, but there was a year when I made around $615 take home every month and my rent was $460... that was the time when I made the criticial decision to get on food stamps. I'm not ashamed on it! I was EXTREMELY THANKFUL for my $76 worth of food stamps every month! And I am thankful for government assistance and think it's GREAT for those who NEED it... but the people who take advantage urk my nerves something terrible!

Anyways, my days on food stamps taught me how to budget for groceries and since i got married FRESH off of my food stamps days, i brought those lessons into my marriage.

Anyways, I am THE CRAZY COUPON LADY!! Every sunday, i clip my coupons, scan through ads, and head to Kroger (which is where I shop about 90% of the time). Kroger always doubles coupons valued at $.40-$.50 and triple coupons valued at $.01-$.39.

We are a family of 3 and our weekly grocery budget is roughly $50. Some weeks I spend $35, some weeks i spend $75, just depends on the time of the month usually. I.E. at the beginning of the month, i usually buy the bulk thing of toilet paper and paper towels.

In couponing, there are some things that i hardly have to pay for! I.E. Toothpaste... i can't remember the last time I paid for Colgate or Crest toothpaste because in combining a coupon with a sale, it's usually free! :) Same goes for Bounty paper towels, and SoftSoap handsoap.

Anyway, today I went to the store and had a good old time! Chris kept the baby and I was in my ZONE :)

Here is a list of some of the items I got for extra extra cheap:

Puff's facial tissue with Vicks. Regular $2.29/box. It was on sale for $1.99/box and I had a coupon for buy one box get one free and another coupon for $.50 off which they doubled to $1 off. So, I got 2 boxes of Puff's with Vicks for $1 (fifty cents per box!!)

Biore facial strips and cleanser: The strips were on sale for $7.99, and the steam activated facial cleanser was on sale for $7.99. I had a coupon for buy strips, get the cleanser free so I saved $8 :)

Purex complete 3-in-1 laundry detergent. Regular $7.99, on sale for $4.49, and I had a $3 off coupon which brought my total to $1.49 for a months worth (or more) of laundry detergent :)

Cheerios and Chex were on sale for $2.18 per box, and I had a $.50 off coupon (for each box) which they doubled to $1, which means I got the cereal for $1.18 per box :)

Fiber 1 yogurt was on sale for $1.98 per 4 pack. I had a $.50 off coupon which they doubled to $1, so I got the yogurt for $.25/piece :) And BONUS: it was key lime pie flavor. and DOUBLE BONUS: It's only worth 1 WW point :)

So in this one shopping trip I spent about $50 and saved about $48!!! :) And that is our groceries for the week :)

Remember, God is a provider and gives you all that you need, but YOU are responsible for how you handle what He gives you! I am SOOO THANKFUL that He provides more for me than I could provide for myself :)

x0x0- The Crazy Coupon Lady

1 year, 8 months, 1 week, 2 days, 11 hours, & COUNTING

WARNING: FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY:

1 year, 8 months, 1 week, 2 days, and 11 hours ....

you're probably thinking i'm talking about the age of Cadence and though that is exactly how old she is, i'm talking specifically about how long i've been a milk maid. Yes, i'm talking about (music dund dun duuunnnn) BREAST MILK!!!

Yes, it has been a LONG LONG road, and yes, I think i'm ready for this road to end.

There are MANY benefits of breastfeeding (though I didn't "nurse" i pumped and bottle/cup fed) and NOTHING in the world can compare to the nutritional benefits that a child receives from their mother's milk. No formula, vegetable, fruit, nor milk is full of more nutrients than breast milk.

As far as providing milk for your child is concerned: THE LONGER, THE BETTER!!! Most women are gonna quit within the first month... Let me encourage you... KEEP GOING! and when you wanna give up, just go one more day because LITERALLY, every ounce counts! And a common misconception is that you're not producing enough milk. That is EXTREMELY RARE!!! If you are nursing, you cannot base your milk supply based on how much you're pumping (unless, like me, you exclusively pump). I was a pumping machine! I was blessed enough to donate over 1,000 oz to the north texas milk bank which supplies milk to sick and premature babies in the NICU. You have to be screened thuroughly in order to be a donor and the milk is cleaned. Though you may not see "immediate" benefits, breast milk sets a foundation for a LIFETIME of health benefits and i'm glad that not only did I provide for my child, but many many others.

Anyways, like most extended breastfeeders (and for lack of a better word, i'll say breastfeeding, though i pump) I never EVER intended on going this long! I thought, i'd go 6 months. The American pediatric association suggests and recommends infants go 6 months on breastmilk exclusively, no other food or drink, for optimal nutrition so that's what I decided to do... AND breast fed baby poop is water soluble (dissolves in water) and that made washing cloth diapers a breeze! so I knew i'd go at least 6 months! 6 months rolled around and I decided to go for a year :)

I actually had an episode after my myomectomy (surgery on my uterus) when Cady was 7 months old. The first day back home, my body went into shock from the pain and i COMPLETELY stopped producing milk! I mean, i went from pumping 10 oz in 20 minutes to pumping 1 ounce in an hour! I called every lactation consultant in DFW crying bc my dr was off that day. I prayed and prayed and PRAYED and pumped enough to make 2 bottles before I got in touch with my Dr. who told me what herbs to get and then prescribed a medication to bring my supply back! The lesson learned: After surgery, when your doctor suggests you stay in the hospital one more day DO IT!!!

Well, like I said, i only planned on going until she was 12 and then switching her to whole milk. 2 days after her first bday, we learned that Cady was highly allergic to milk! It was by the grace of God that we found out about her allergy before we ever gave her any milk. (We knew she was allergic to eggs so she got an allergy test via blood work and that's when her milk allergy showed up). Then I said i'd pump until she was 18 months. All the while I've been preparing my body for the change. I went from pumping 5 times a day (at the beginning) to 4 times, to 3 times, to 2 times.

This week... i'm down to pumping just one time a day which means eventually I will dry up and will be DONE for good :) Whoo Hooh, right?

Honestly, it's bittersweet. For starters, i had my milk analyzed and found out that I burn 20 calories per ounce of milk that i pump!!! It's free exercise! lol Man, at the beginning, i'd EASILY pump 60 ounces a day!!!! That made losing my 45+ pregnancy pounds a whole lot easier to lose let me tell you! I would eat and eat and EAT and still lose weight!!! I lost all 45 lbs in about 10 weeks!!!

Anyway, i've been on a mad hunt to find a milk alternative for Cady because she, like all toddlers, need it in their life. I've tried soy milk, rice milk, almond milk, and coconut milk. And i have not been successful :( She won't drink it!

So, we have decided to make her homemade yogurt smoothies at least twice a day and that will be considered her dairy beverage. Lucky her right!!! You know how much Jamba Juice charges for fresh fruit and yogurt smoothies, lol! Oddly enough, she doesn't have any reactions to yogurt but she does react to yogurt beverages like Dannon, etc. It sucks! Her milk allergy affects her internal organs so we can't SEE her reactions like we can see her egg reaction. It usually starts with stomach pains and then she poops (black) which means her organs are bleeding. It's kinda scary to say the least but usually, once all the milk is out of her system she's fine.

Anyways, I'm down to pumping just once a day and it's bitter sweet! My morning "sessions" have been WONDERFUL... it's quite, just me, and it's the perfect time for bible study/devotion! It's not like I'm going anywhere, so i give my undivided attention to God.

Last week, I told Chris that I was going to stop (my supply is dwindling so it's not like I have that much of a choice) and i actually cried! I never thought i'd be emotional about it and still don't really know why i cried but I did. But my mind is made up and nature has ran it's course :(

Oh, and just remember, JESUS WAS BREASTFED :)

xoxo ~ you can call me COW and I won't be affended

worst date EVER.. a trip down memory lane

Today was "date day" for me and Chris.... well, that was the intention of today anyway. We all slept in late. I went and got a massage. Came home and found Chris at the table on his laptop in the EXACT same spot I left him earlier.

The plan for today was to go to breakfast and a movie sans la bebe. So I took Cady to Stephanie's, went to my massage, and came home... Instead of breakfast and a movie, we went to brunch and an oil change, lol.

Chris fell asleep on the 7 minute drive home, got straight in the bed and is still sleep :( I folded 2 baskets of laundry, threw a load in the wash, unloaded the dishwasher, and spent a few minutes on the net.

Some date day, huh!

Well, today's date is about A BILLION times better than one of our early "young and in love" dates.

Picture this: summer 2002, San Antonio Tx

Chris and I had been dating for about 7 months or so. It was summer time and he moved back to S.A. and i moved back to Waco for the summer. We couldn't stand to be without each other, lol. so every other weekend, I would hop on a 4 hour bus ride to go visit him for the weekend.

On one trip in particular, Chris decided to surprise me with a romantic date to the park.

He told me we were going to one of his friend's house and so when he pulled up to an apt complex I was like ok... but when we got out of the car, chris walked to the trunk and pulled out a blanket and told me that we were going to have a romantic date on the pond. We were in the honeymoon stage in our relationship and though it was a good idea, it was an EPIC fail :(

He decided we would walk around the pond and feed the ducks or something like that. I remember walking, and other people were walking, and because it was surrounded by a complex, other people were everywhere... and their brought their DOGS!!! What am I afraid of most??? DOGS!!! People had their dogs on one side, and ducks were walking up on the other side. What else am I afraid of? DUCKS!!! So basically, I walked huddled under his arms terrified to look both ways, walking as fast as possible, wishing the date would just end already!

We finally find a "resting" place and Chris lays out the blanket and tells me he would be right back. Yep, he left me alone (for maybe 2 minutes but in duck-ville, and dog-land, it felt like an hour). He came back with strawberries and homemade icing (he knew of my love for sweets so he got kuddo's right??? WRONG!!!! The icing was HORRIBLE! He tries to pull that "close your eyes and open your mouth" business and i was sooo in love, I did :( It was disgusting!!! After I took a bite, he tells me that he thinks he messed up the recipe! NOW U TELL ME!!! lol

So basically, we ended up packing everything up and going back to his parent's house.

I wonder if he remembers that day. maybe i'll ask him when he wakes up ;)

x0x0, still young, still in love,

e.j.knox

i'm a meat eating VEGETARIAN :)

Based on the things i've been eating this past week, you would in NO WAY guess that I was a full pledged vegetarian just a month ago! Yep, 4 1/2 years completely meatless (except that time chris PROMISED that he brought home a cheese taquito and we were both surprised when i took a huge bite and found pork inside... and that time i TORE UP some of cute-will's mom's homemade dip until I found out it was loaded with bacon, lol).

Yep, vegetarianism wasn't a diet... it was a LIFESTYLE! And an easy one at that! You see, I ate the exact same thing any other "meat eater" would eat, just prepared in a different way! I used meat substitute, soy protein, etc. It was quite an easy transition for me bc i've never really been a big meat eater! I was one of the few, the PROUD, the vegetarian!

I've never been a card carrying member of PETA... in fact, i've said millions of times that I don't think there's anything wrong with eating meat and vegetarian's are necessarily any healthier than anybody else. I personally was against the growth hormones and preparation of meat and so i chose not to eat it. Was that my primary reason, maybe, maybe not. It's a tough question to answer to be honest.

Another common misconception was that I "forced" my daughter to be a vegetarian. SO NOT TRUE!! Chris and I have never forced her to do anything... is it even possible to force a baby/toddler to do anything in life? lol. However, let me be clear that I did withhold introducing her to meat because I wanted to lay a solid foundation for her as far as eating is concerned. Lots of children won't eat vegetables bc they don't have a solid foundation of eating them. I started off feeding her vegetables so vegetables would be all that she knew for a while. Then came fruit (sugar), then came meat. I have been and still am EXTREMELY INTENTIONAL in feeding Cady. I make it a point to feed her at least 1 rainbow a day! I never bought her baby food. I made it with fresh ingredients every day from the time she was 6 months until she was 1 year old. For the first 6 months, I did exactly what the experts recommend and she exclusively ate (drank) breast milk. "Normal" people may have thought that was strange, but i researched and did exactly what every pediatric specialist/professional/expert in nutrition recommended... so yes, i'm guilty, i listened to the experts instead of them, lol. We laid a foundation which introduced her to nothing but healthy, non processed food. I was very very intentional in that! And i'm proud to say that my daughter makes very good eating choices because of that :) She still chooses leafy greens over non healthy stuff and that makes me smile :) Rarely do we feed her anything that's not home made... but i'm normal and have been known to feed her a kid's meal a time or two ;) But do I feed her avacado's with her Sonic kid's meal?? SURE DO! Gotta have something green on that plate, lol

Now, with that being said, I told chris that I was thinking about reintroducing meat into my system. I did think this through because there are a whole lot of benefits to being vegetarian. It was soooo easy on my system! I mean, i was able to digest food in a matter of minutes it seemed like. I rarely got that "heavy" feeling unless i really did eat too much.

Well, let's rewind to about 3 weeks ago... being the smart vegetarian I am I know that reintroducing would be a sorta slow process and i needed to start with either chicken or turkey...i chose chicken and to be honest, was NOT impressed in the least! Didn't matter if i cooked it or ordered it, i just was not a fan! The texture was weird, the taste was weird and i just wasn't impressed. Chris said the texture that I felt from eating chicken was comparable to the texture others felt when i made them eat my vegetarian "meat" haha. My bad guys :) After the first 3 days I told chris i was going back to my ways but first wanted to try something else........

and that's when I started eating turkey! It was week 2. I made teryaki turkey legs and they were DELICIOUS! Not so great as left overs. But great otherwise.

I'm thinking, ok, i can stick to turkey and be fine :) .... until i was making Cady some spaghetti and was blowing her ground beef to cool it off and i tasted the juice... then i took a bite.... and that is when i found TRUE LOVE!!! I've been hooked since that first day!! haha I've had spaghetti, hanburgers, taco's, sloppy joes...all things that I ate prepared in the vegetarian way but it was NOTHING in comparison to the deliciousness i felt from ground beef! I'm already planning on eating taco's for breakfast :)

I will say that beef is EXPENSIVE!!! I hold true to my word and only buy all natural, meat with no added hormones, etc. A pound of ground beef is about $6 for the 98% fat free, all natural stuff. The hormone added, 80/20 meat is about $1.99/pound. I'm not happy about the price but I think it's worth it. I'm sure i'd be singing a different tune if I had to feed more than 2 1/2 people though, lol. I get chicken and turkey at central market and surprisingly, it's not too expensive!! It's the same price as regular meat at Kroger. Maybe Central Market will have their beef on sale this weekend! I'm balling on a budget ya know!

I do feel "heavy" after eating beef in particular, so when the package says 4 servings, i usually stretch it to 6 servings.

Sooooo, with that being said, I, ERIKA J. KNOX, THE PROUD VEGETARIAN, LOVES BEEF! :) Could I go back to being a vegetarian? Of course, very easily! And I probably will end up going back one day i'm sure. I plan on eating meat only a few times a week.

But not now... not today! I'm eating tacos!!!

XoXo- the meat eating vegetarian :)

DUH.... opposites attract

We live in a society where people get to chose their spouse... in some cultures, your spouse is chosen for you!

I'm almost 100% POSITIVE no online dating service would match me and Chris.

But somehow, we found each other and after more than 9 years together are are still very much so in LOVE... and in LIKE, on most days, lololol.

If there's one thing you notice right off the back when you meet me and christopher and learn that we are married, it's the fact that we are almost polar opposites! LOL And yes, i say that with a smile :)

Chris is a man of few words! He may not talk alot, but he makes darn sure that what he says counts (many of you know what i'm talking about). He chooses his words very carefully, is soft spoken, and has been 30 years old since the day I met him if you know what I mean, lol. Chris, thinks before he speaks. If you ever wonder why you've been around chris for months or even YEARS and have barely heard him say 3 sentences, let me give you a heads up... he is watching you... studying you... and is very much into the conversation so when he does speak, make darn sure you LISTEN because it will probably be quote worthy, and you will probably want to take notes!!! He is very neutral so if you ask for his opinion he will give you a very wise answer that has insight and will probably open your eyes to a different light. I totally love that about him! He will tell you and FULLY SUPPORT you when you are right.... but when you are wrong, you will know it too! I have the pleasure of being his wife so he'll pretty much have my back on anything, HA :) lol

Me on the other hand, i will talk about everything and it don't mean NOTHING! I talk often, i talk loud, i talk long, i talk talk talk! I love conversation. I can probably talk about any subject that any one in the world brings up and will probably have a strong opinion on the matter. It's hard for me to be neutral. My opinion is based on either a personal experience or what I THINK YOU SHOULD DO or should have done, lol. Though I may not always be right or accurate, i can guarantee you will at least be amused by what I have to say. Chris says i say stuff for shock value. I recognize that not everyone gets my sarcasm or sense of humor, like when I introduce him to people as "my first husband, Chris..." or the day after I gave birth and the lady came by to pick up the birth certificate and i asked her if we would still need a paternity test even though he signed the birth certificate... I recognize that I say things that are random. I often speak before I think. But i NEVER intend on being rude or offensive.

Chris is very organized, very responsible. Me on the other hand, I like to consider myself a free spirit ;)

Chris is tall, I'm short and proud of it.

Chris has 15/15 perfect vision... i have 70/80 vision, and the $135 eye exam bill to go with it :(

Chris is very calm and i NEVER raises his voice... EVER!!! I will yell in a minute! Not in a mean way, but just to be loud and hear myself talk :)

Chris lets me practice my Nikita moves on him every thursday, and i get to practice my Italian/new jersey accent after each episode of the Cake Boss.

Chris is far from perfect... and so am I... only Jesus is..... however, we are PERFECT for each other.

And because of those oppositions, I understand why people would never in a million years put us together... but you know what people... WE WORK!!! and we work great :) Chris calms me down, and i liven him up and because Christ is the center of our relationship, we have 9 years down, and 100 more to go :)

x0x0 - E.J. Knox

THE day-- "V" day

It's always fun to hear people talk about how their boy/girl friend or wife/husband treated them extra special and bought them super sweet and romantic gifts for Valentines day. In my mind, i'm like, why couldn't she/he show you all that love on Feb 13...why do they have to wait for a hallmark holiday? I never really get it. honestly!

Poor Chris, right? EXACTLY! LOL. I don't like chocolate, i don't like flowers, teddy bears get thrown somewhere in the back of the closet, gifts will probably be lost, and overall, I would prefer he NOT "prove his love" on the same day other people in a relationship go and "prove" theirs.

I mean, don't get me wrong.... i appreciate the cards that he gives me :) I usually get 2 cards. 1 funny one, followed by one "serious" one that always has nice hand written letters inside. I LOVE those :)

I pretty much never buy him any thing for V day. I will hand write him a card or something. I can NEVER find a card that says exactly what I want to say to him, so i just write my own.

We have never really made a big deal over this holiday. I mean, we may have the first few months we were dating. I remember he gave me a singing bear, and made me this HUUUUGGGGEEEE card with the gigantic construction paper :) It was nice and sweet. At that time he didn't know that that was not my love language and it was really thoughtful of him :)

One v-day, he left a fake rose on my car (we lived in the same apartments) with a handwritten note about how roses are always beautiful but the beauty fades but how i'm beautiful and like the artificial flower's beautify will never fade, neither will mine :) SO SWEET, right! :) A few days later we got engaged, so it was just a set up ;0

I read on FB how someone's husband woke up super early and made her breakfast while her kids were still sleep and though I agree that was soooo sweet and thoughtful, all i could think about that would be an epic fail if that were my husband doing that! i HATE breakfast, and the thought of eating before 2 hours of me waking up would suck lol.

Other people talk about what gifts they received and blah blah... again, would be an epic fail.... gifts is NOT my love language and RARELY am i impressed with any gift i've ever received. Don't confuse that with me not appreciating gifts! I do appreciate them :) But u know the saying "it's the thought that counts" well, that's me! I'd rather someone be extrememly THOUGHTFUL and buy me a $4 gift that I would mean a lot (or make something that I could treasure), than putting no thought in to a $500 gift card... seriously! The best gift I've ever rec'd from Chris was when I was pregnant and had the worse fibroid pain EVER, he bought me a $20 gopher so i could pick up stuff without having to bend over! That gift was TREASURED and i used that thing until it broke! Oooohhh, one Christmas, Chris' parents bought me my FAVORITE childhood candy that you can't find in stores (Big Hunk) so they had to order it from somewhere. Talk about a gift that ROCKS :)

Different strokes for different folks so THIS valentine's day, i hope you celebrate in what works for YOU and YOUR RELATIONSHIP! What may be the sweetest and most romantic thing EVER to one couple, may be the most BORING and BLAND think ever to another couple. Whatever it be, have fun this valentine's day, and to my married friends, have a fun Valentine's night :)

driving in the snow without wings

Picture this: Texas. August. 2005. Chris and I were 2 newlyweds in LOVE and on our honeymoon in Port Aransas. You know what its like to be brand new in your marriage.. i'm talking 3 days into being Mrs. Christopher B. Knox II... nothing could erase the smile on my face! Not our first argument as a married couple in our hotel room (over chap stick), not me getting lost in downtown san antonio in a car alone with no cell phone and not being able to remember the name of our hotel. Not even the group of girls asking me if it was my Quincinera (how do u spell that?) when they saw me walking in the hotel lobby in my wedding gown. NOPE, NOTHING!

We were in love. We were 1. We were MARRIED!

We were driving from place to place just enjoying each other's company when we decided to drive to the beach :) The first day, it was beautiful! Chris drove my little Mitsubishi Mirage on the sand to find the perfect location for us to cuddle, kiss, and prove to any and everyone who was looking that we were in LOVE!!!

The next day we go back to the beach, and as Chris is driving in the sand I ask (in my newlywed 16 year old school girl crush voice) "Can I drive"... I can tell chris was a little hesitant but he said "Sure!" I get behind the wheel and as he is kinda screaming (chris doesn't really ever raise his voice so it was the closest thing to a scream he has) "Press the gas harder!! Don't let up on the gas!!!" I ask "WHAT?!" as I let my foot off of the gas!

... and that's where we got stuck! :( We were both a little dumbfounded, i was a little in shock, and chris was borderline upset (Chris never really gets upset so i'll say he was disappointed). I'm still a newlywed right, so it's "cute" that i'm stuck in the sand. No big deal, right? WRONG! Chris ended up having to dig my car out of the sand BY HAND! it took FOREVER. Remember, it's in the middle of the day in August in Texas! I get out the car, not to help, but to watch of course. After about 45 minutes a guy pulls up and tells us he has a friend who can tow our car out for a small fee of course. He calls his friend and i think he was gonna charge us like $150.... My college tuition was due in a couple weeks so it didn't take us longer than half a second to tell that guy no thanks and Chris dug some more! Meanwhile I'm searching for the camera because I have to get a picture of this!!! Still, no help from the new bride, lol.

A few minutes later, some teenage "partiers" in an old beat up car ask if they can help. By the looks of their car we were doubtful, but it managed to work :) We were free and I haven't driven on sand since.

That brings us to the current day. It's snowing outside :( Yesterday I drove on the slick roads and as I pull out of the garage, my loving husband comes to the car to tell me to "put it in 2nd gear so you won't roll" and to "drive safe" and the other precautions that a loving, responsible husband tells his care free, yet careful wife. I made it to my destination and he called to check on me :)

Today, i think i can drive in the snow right? I've been driving for well over 10 years but my loving husband pulls the car out of the garage and makes a "path" for me. He comes in with this ice shovel thing and tells me how to use it on my windshield (that ain't happening!!! Any decent man anywhere will do it for me, right ;) lol. He gives me a few pointers on safety, etc., and kisses me goodbye.

I walk to the car and go on my merrily little way. About 20 minutes and 4 miles down the road, I had to stop at a light :( I tried to go when the light turned green but guess what happened. I got stuck :( I didn't panic... i just heard my love's voice in my head and moved to 2nd gear... nothing. 1st gear... nothing! Reeve the engine, 1st gear, 2nd gear, reeve, 2nd gear... NOTHING! I called my husband... no answer. I tried again.. no answer. Still no panic because i'm a big girl now! Breathe... 1st gear.. nothing.. 2nd gear.. and SUZIE SUZUKI decided to drive! I did it!!! :)

I drive for about 4 seconds and my mind immediately goes back to driving on the sand and getting stuck. Yesterday, Chris said the Suzuki was safer to drive in the snow than the Mercedes (which i wanted to drive bc it's a manual transmission) but that thought immediately left my mind and i slowly but surely drove back home (after my trip to target, which was my turn around spot).

and the moral of this story is.... you can't drive in the snow without wings!

Toodles, MRS. C. B. Knox II